Happiness Points

In case you didn’t know (I’m assuming most of you don’t, although some of you may be a little too familiar), there are such things as happiness points. Now, I actually didn’t know about happiness points until my brother pointed them out to me. After he did that, it made so much sense. So I’m going to explain it to you all so that you will also have a better understanding of how the world works.

Actually, happiness points have much to do with one’s stats. I would abbreviate happiness points as HP, but that might be confusing because HP really means hit points. Although maybe if you are low on happiness points, you lose your HP more easily. It only makes sense.

I’ve also made some pictures to help you better understand the workings of happiness points. But just so we’re clear, I didn’t want to write out happiness points in the pictures, so in the pictures they’re abbreviated, in the text, they are not.

Exhibit 1

Here you have a perfect example of a person with happiness points. Various things may give you happiness points. You may have a very large lollipop. If you like lollipops, I’m sure you would be happy. Other things may make you happy. For me, it might be a long nap. Or soupy noodles. Or reading a good book. Etc. I’m sure you understand this idea.

There are some people, however, who mainly derive their happiness points from stealing from others. (I just realized that I did the math wrong in my pictures, so if things don’t add up visually, you’ll know why. I’ll explain it though.) I think everyone does it to some degree or another, but just don’t want to admit it to themselves. They probably secretly enjoy it, too. Because some people may think that they are a Nice Person. But if you understand humanity, you’ll know that everyone is actually a Bad Person. And a Bad Person likes to steal happiness points from other people. But enough of philosophizing.

A Bad Person who enjoys stealing happiness points likes to ruin other people’s fun. I’m sure you’ve done it every once in a while.

Exhibit 2

A Bad Person does not necessarily have negative happiness points. They just want to have more happiness points. As everyone does. So how does a Bad Person steal happiness points? They may do a variety of things.

Exhibit 3

Stealing happiness points doesn’t mean you steal the points themselves. I’m not quite sure how that would work. Stealing happiness points mainly means that you make someone else a little less happy.

Exhibit 4

So I’ve done the math wrong. I really meant that the person who originally had the candy would have Happiness Points -25, because they lost a total of 75 happiness points. Meanwhile, the Bad Person got extra points (more than 75), both because he now has the candy and he also gets happiness points from the action of stealing the candy and making the other person sad.

I’ve inflated the points a little bit to illustrate the idea of stealing happiness points. Stealing happiness points may include things like poking fun at a person. Or punching someone you don’t like. Or… well, I can’t think of any more off the top of my head. But you get the idea.

There are also such things as what I like to call free floating happiness points. (I was going to call them free radicals, but I don’t think it’s quite the same thing.) Basically, you can collect free floating happiness points… I’m not sure how. But they float around. And you somehow manage to collect them. I was going to illustrate, but I don’t feel like it anymore. So you’ll just have to use your imagination. My friend requests that you imagine them as free floating jewels or urns/vases that you have to break open with a mallet. Well, she didn’t request, but she asked that I illustrate them that way. I’m lazy, so I’m just telling you to imagine them that way.

Say something! Make me laugh!

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