Time Traveler Extraordinaire!


Here’s another episode of “Sheri–Adventuress Extraordinaire!” Or maybe it would be more aptly named “Sheri–Bad at Math!” That one is probably a little bit more appropriate. Anyways. For those who don’t know, I went on a trip! Huzzah for trips! I was on vacation (a.k.a. putting more hours in my sleep account) somewhere in the Midwest. And being a shadow. ‘Twas fun. Sleeping, that is. And shadowing of course.

Anywho, in case you weren’t aware, when you travel from West to East, you lose time. In other words, you’re going into the future. I mean, if you get on a plane in an area designated as Pacific Standard Time (PST) at 1 p.m.–let’s say, Los Angeles–and fly to somewhere within the range of Eastern Standard Time (EST), i.e. New York City, you would get there approximately 9:45 p.m. According to the reliable source known as the Internet, a flight from LA to NYC takes about 5 hours and 45 minutes. So why do you arrive at 9:45 p.m.? What happened to those three extra hours? The obvious answer? You traveled into the future. Duh.

So let’s say you’re going from the East Coast to the West Coast. What does that mean? Yes, the answer is equally obvious. You’re travelling into the past.

Okay, now that we’ve got all that cleared up, here is the story.

While I was in the Midwest (which for those who don’t know, is two hours into the future from us here on the West Coast. They’re on something called Central Standard Time (CST). I guess that makes sense, seeing as how’re they’re the Midwest.) Anyways. So flying back from the Midwest, I had a layover in Houston. Houston, I believe is on CST. My flight from Houston left at 8:25 p.m., and according to my calculations, I was going to be home by 9:00 p.m. Yes, home. As in arrive at my apartment at 9:00 at night. I’m not exactly sure what I was thinking, but I had somehow calculated that I would get home at 9:00 p.m. Granted you gain two hours when you travel from CST to PST, but the flight takes 3.5 hours.

Actually, I was under the impression that the flight was only an hour and a half long. But even so, the numbers still don’t add up. By the way, numbers and I don’t get along very well, which might be evinced by my miscalculation. And I have actually checked my numbers for this post, so I think they’re mostly right. If I made a mistake, you now know why.

Anyways, while I was on the plane, I still didn’t figure out that I wasn’t going to be home by 8:30. About an hour and a half through the flight, I began to wonder why the flight was still going on, and why we still weren’t beginning to descend yet. At that point, I figured, maybe the flight is actually two hours. But then two hours went by, and I was beginning to be confused. Actually, I’m not sure I was even that clear about how long the flight was. But I was definitely sure that it was longer than what I had originally thought.

At this time my overactive imagination began to kick in. I was thinking that both the pilot and co-pilot possibly probably fell asleep at the wheel(?) and we were just going fly and fly and fly into the Pacific ocean, and then after we ran out of gas we were going to just fall into the ocean. And then I began to plan out the things I would bring and wondering about if my identification was enough for my bloated body to be identified. Anyways. About this time the plane began to descend so I figured that the pilots had not fallen asleep and we were going to be okay.

By the time that we landed and we were allowed to have our cell phones on, I was trying to figure out what time it was. For some reason, my cell phone was telling me that it was 9:30 p.m. In my head I was thinking, that’s not right. Maybe my phone is still on CST. So really, it’s 7:30 p.m. That would have made sense. But then my phone was telling me that I was in LA. So something was wrong here. Either time had gone wrong or I had miscalculated.

I guess I had miscalculated. So I was replaying this miscalculation to my friend who graciously picked me up, and she told me that I was probably trying to time travel -1 hour. And somehow my time travelling machine had broken. And I had arrived later than I was supposed to.

Anyways.

I failed at time traveling. But… I guess that still makes me a time traveler extraordinaire! It’s better to have tried and failed than to not try at all.

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2 thoughts on “Time Traveler Extraordinaire!

  1. Pingback: Professional airport circler « Random moosages as I see fit.

  2. Pingback: Breaking and entering « Random moosages as I see fit.

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